Parents of school children all over 4007 are demanding answers after it was revealed Book Week is actually just a special brand of mind fuckery developed by the Department of Education to keep parents questioning, yet again, why the hell they had kids in the first place.
Book Week, or as it’s more commonly known, ‘Fucking Book Week’ is a school tradition that was allegedly started to annoy the bejesus out of parents and is now a time honored pain-in-the-arse, right up there with returning unsold raffle tickets, homework, and the Easter bonnet parade.
The theme this year for Fucking Book Week is ‘Ancient Greek mythological creatures……in outer space’ and has had parents all over 4007 in a spin, googling how to make a Centaur space costume out of 38 egg cartons, toilet rolls and a bit of masking tape.
‘We like to make the theme harder and harder just to screw with them,’ said one anonymous teacher. ‘The key is the 48 hour notice period, of which we know kids will automatically reduce to 24 or 12 hrs.’
‘Let’s face it. Parents and teachers have been hating on each other since the beginning of time’, said the teacher. ‘‘Fucking Book Week’ is keeping that particular situation in check. And, if that hasn’t cemented it, every child will be issued a recorder, or as it’s more commonly known, a ‘fucking recorder’ – the musical instrument of choice for sociopaths, despots and sadists the world over.’
When the teacher was questioned over the OTT approach to Book Week she had the following message to parents.
‘Suck shit.’
More to come.
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Begrudgingly, I have to agree I’d rather wear crotchless lululemons to Pilates than deal with “Fucking Book Week”. I’m going to Airtask the shit out of it this year or get my Aupair to deal with it!