The Racecourse rd precinct is in line for a light beautification project after residents complained that it looks nothing like Hastings street. The project involves bombing the entire street, and starting again.
An independent unbiased committee made up of white rich-arse women aged between 45-46 ish, carried out an assessment of the area and spoke with the Observer candidly about their recommendations.
‘No amount of fairy lights can dress up this shit show’ said Emma Wilkinson, 8th generation local gal and first fleet Ascot descendent. ‘And frankly, it looks nothing like Hastings street.’
‘There’s basically nowhere to spend a few grand. Unless I need to pick up a snazzy pair of shoes for my Grandmother. In which case there are 16 boutiques to choose from.’
The Observer understands the entire street will be razed, with the exception of essential services including Bar 150 and the Ascot Cosmetic Surgery clinic.
‘I don’t want to be alarmist’ said Ms Wilkinson, ‘but unless we do something soon, the Hemsworths are never going to visit.’
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